BUILD YOUR PEOPLE SKILLS

BUILD YOUR PEOPLE SKILLS

Whether at home, in the workplace, or in personal relationships, experiencing satisfying connections with others is a cornerstone of living an Abundant Life. While getting along better with others may seem like something we have no control over (the nagging boss, the whiney coworker, the distant spouse), people skills, or emotional intelligence, can be learned. By focusing on the following 6 specific and manageable skills, we can improve the relationships in our lives:

1. Build Others Self-esteem. You know what it’s like to be in a situation where you are made to feel good about yourself. You can do the same for others and enhance the quality of your relationships by trying the following examples:

Make eye contact and call them by their names.

Ask others their opinions.

Tell people how much you appreciate them.

Write notes of thanks.

Pay attention to what is going on in people’s lives.

Acknowledge milestones and share in their excitement.

Express concern about difficult situations as well.

Encourage others to explore their talents and interests.

Honor people’s needs and wants.

2. Show Empathy for Others. Empathy means recognizing emotions in others. It is the capacity to put yourself in another person’s shoes and understand his or her view of reality. Being aware of one’s emotions and how they affect one’s actions is a fundamental ability in today’s people-intense workplaces, and of course, in any personal relationship.
3. Encourage people to cooperate with each other.. Whether you are managing a family or a work group, here are some specific guidelines you can use to create an environment where people work together well:

Don’t play favorites. Treat everyone the same and develop trust.

Ask for other’s ideas and encourage participation.

Follow up on suggestions, requests and comments. Be true to your word.

Check for understanding when you make a statement or give instructions. Don’t assume everyone is with you.

Reinforce and praise cooperative behavior. Never take it for granted.
4. Communicate Assertively. Assertive communication is a constructive way to express feelings and opinions. It differs from passive or aggressive behavior in that it is honest, direct, self-expressive, and always constructive. Assertive communication enables you to assert your personal rights without denying the rights of others.
5. Ask productive questions and demonstrate listening skills. Listening skills show that you are hearing and understanding another person and are interested in what he or she has to say.
6. Respond productively to emotional statements. Active listening is especially useful in emotional situations because it enables you to demonstrate that you understand what the other person is saying and how he or she feels about it. Active listening is not the same as agreeing, rather it is a way to demonstrate that you intend to hear and understand another’s point of view.
Action tip: The ability to create more satisfying relationships in our lives is within our power by developing and practicing this set of learned skills. Start today with that coworker or family member who may be driving you crazy! What can you be doing differently, starting today?

Jim

At Perfect Partner Coaching
a service of J and B Consulting Services